QRS Buffalo NY Annotated Thermometer
By Karl Ellison
QRS/Buffalo NY Temperature Guide
60 (F) and above
~ Pennsylvanians try to turn on the heat.
~ QRS employees open windows and complain of the heat.
50 above
~ Californians shiver uncontrollably.
~ QRS employees apply sun block.
40 above
~ Italian cars refuse to start.
~ QRS employees wash their cars in bathing suits on Saturday.
32 above
~ Distilled water freezes.
~ Lake Erie water gets thicker.
20 above
~ Floridans wear coats, gloves and woolly hats.
~ QRS employees throw on a heavy T-shirt.
15 above
~ New Jersey landlords finally turn up the heat.
~ QRS employees have the last company cook-out before it gets cold.
- 0 -
~ People in Miami cease to exist.
~ QRS employees close windows, thinking about where the storm windows
are hidden.
20 below
~ Louisiana people get out their winter coats.
~ QRS employees have trouble getting end-tabs to stick.
40 below
~ Californians fly away to Mexico.
~ QRS employees begin selling rolls door-to-door.
60 below
~ Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica.
~ Bob Berkman postpones "Employee Winter Survival Driving" classes
until it gets cold enough.
80 below
~ Mt. St. Helens freezes.
~ The QRS stenciling machine is sluggish.
100 below
~ Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
~ QRS employees get frustrated when the perforator won't start.
297 below
~ Roll masters have frozen solid.
~ Bob Berkman allows QRS office employees to wear gloves
while working.
460 below (Absolute Zero)
~ All atomic motion stops.
~ QRS employees finally agree "It's getting a mite nippy."
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(Message sent Mon 15 Nov 1999, 16:31:36 GMT, from time zone GMT-0500.) |
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